I always thought I understood myself perfectly. I thought that unlike everyone else I’m actually just a simple person, but no one human being is simple in any way. Everyone is complicated and I kinda just ignore myself lol I don’t want to try and figure myself out or try to deal with myself in any way. I just do what I want regardless of any consequences whether I lose a friend or whatever. I do what makes me happy- I don’t question it lol
I still think it’s funny how no one knows each other. I think I’ve changed so much and for the better (:
I was definitely able to sneak in the Ibert Concerto. YES. My life is complete.
As for composition, my director gave me THE PRIVILEGE to go over it with my school’s wind ensemble. It went horribly wrong, but nothing I can’t fix. There was one beautiful moment for about 5 seconds.
So I finished my first full score band composition last weekend (March 17, 2012). My director is letting me pass out my song and conduct the class to work on my song for a while! I’m so blessed!
Right now I have to clean and filter the parts, continue to work on percussion, and edit the Bari Sax parts. I’m also writing another band song for a lower concert band. I’m thinking maybe instead of a concert band piece, turning it into an orchestrated church hymn. We’ll see how it plays out!
> Also, as far as I know, I’m performing Prokofiev’s 5th sonata, Muczynski’s three preludes, and Faure Fantasie for my senior recital. I’m gonna try and sneak in Ibert’s Concerto instead of the muczynksi pieces. (: HA HAAA
My teacher let me take home a FULL SCORE!!! but it’s really hard.
:l
I had a great audition! I’m so blessed, thanks God!!
When I think of the future… I don’t see myself as a musician. I feel like, I’m a musician now, but when I grow up, I’ll be something I don’t even know yet. That’s the problem though, I am grown up and music is the path I’m choosing. Maybe something else will happen along the way, maybe the rest of my life IS music. Who knows.
Sometimes I want to talk to people, but I don’t know how. So, I’ll say hi and stop replying. They’ll think I’m weird. I just wanna hear a hello back and then I don’t want to talk to anyone.
Talking to someone late at night or when your sad is like talking to someone drunk. You’re vulnerable and can easily open and say things you’ll regret. In the morning, when everything is better, you’ll regret opening up the way you did because now that person knows too much of you. You might even make a fool of yourself.
Hayley came over after school and we walked down to in-n-out. Then we came home and then I ended up showing her my compositions. I feel bad, I was focused on myself. She asked to know more about me like my favorite colors and stuff since we’re good friends. She left and then I took a nap and then I had flute lessons. from 5:15-7:40 Because Rosy was on the phone for a little while and then the next student came a little late. And then she had an older student of hers come to listen to me. He helped me with some of Machu Picchu: City in the Sky by Satoshi Yagisawa. It was a little embarassing because to be honest… I haven’t practiced honor band music at all really. Just a little a month ago. I’ve been focusing on my CSUN audition music. yup. Now I have to finish some homework.
night.
mainly because I feel lighter. I watched Anger Management with my parents and it was really funny. I’m really sleepy and I’m ready for bed aha
Goodnight.
